A quiet evening in my chair

I'm sitting in my chair. I love this chair. It's a big, striped double chair with an ottoman and it came from the salvation army a couple years ago. It's in bad shape, and some of the fabric is rotten. Plus, when I sit in my chair, I'm an island so we don't all sit together. Peter would like for us to sit together. Tonight is the last night I will really spend in my chair since on Saturday our new sectional sofa will be delivered. It's got a chaise lounger at one end and 2 ottomans so we will have lots of room to stretch out together on the sofa as a family. I'm really looking forward to it, but I am going to miss my cozy chair. I don't think there is room for it and the new sofa both in the living room.

I'm going camping with my girlfriends over the weekend. Originally a bunch of us were going to take our kids and slowing the kids dropped off till it was just Jena and Maggie left Cat and I decided that we would ditch the kids on Peter (actually, he volunteered happily) and we could just have an adult weekend. We don't get those often so it will be a blast. We are going tomorrow afternoon and will be back on Sunday. It's all been made possible by my friend Alexa, who is going to let Maggie hang out with her on Friday. I'm very grateful and will have to do something nice for her...we're going to breakfast first thing. maybe I'll buy her breakfast?

I'm very tired tonight. It's been a long week. I will get up in the morning and pack up the truck and hit the road early so we can get on the road and get set up and get busy with the process of hanging out.

I lost .2 pounds this week. I forgot to report last week. I was up .4 pounds last week and I lost .2 this week, so I have hovered between 199, my lowest and 200.4 the last couple weeks. I have stepped up exercise and I'm eating better. I can really tell now when I've had too much sodium b/c I feel bloated. On the flip side I'm wearing clothes I have owned and not ever been able to wear and I had to return a pair of pants I ordered that would have been the right size not too long ago. That's a good thing.

Maggie has taken up running with alexa...I'm going to have to start running to keep up with her.

on getting bucked off

It hurts more to get bucked off a big horse than it does a small horse. I had gone 3.5 years without being bucked off and it was lovely. Yesterday, that all changed when I over cued a green horse and fell off after 2 bucks. It was not pretty. The people watching said that besides the one expletive I uttered that I said "I'm going down" and then I hit the dirt. I was fine and I got back up and rode Merlin some more...but I didn't ask him to canter again. The worst part was that it happened while I was teaching and everyone at the barn was watching the lesson or just sort of hanging out. It was really embarrassing.

Maggie has been sick with the stomach bug, and I'm thinking it's happening to me now. I have a slight fever and my tummy is growling, but so far so good. I almost never throw up and hope to keep it that way.

The weather here is been amazing! Next weekend a bunch of us from my barn are going camping. I'm still trying to work out the details. Originally it started out being adults and kids b/c some of the folks had to take the kids or not go. Now some of it has changed and I find myself wishing that I could go without maggie and have an adult weekend. But, it will be fun.

I'm starting to plan next summer out already. Maggie is going to camp in Bar 50 ranch to camp in mid-july. I did that math and figured out that it was cheaper to stay the week there than it was to drive there and back on either end of the week. Plus, Maggie will be more likely to have fun knowing I'm close by. I know it's too early for most people, but I'm hoping that I can get friends to come spend the week with me. I can camp and ride and relax and swim and be there so Maggie isn't worried or alone since she's never done overnight camp before.

I'm afraid I'm getting her bug...Signing off now b/c I'm not feeling so hot.

Frankie could be a good dog!

Frankie could be a good dog, but only if he got to go on the trail for 10+ miles a day. He went to Arkansas with us and seemed to be having a great time. He's normally such a bad dog, but he was just great all w/e. He was loose with us in the camp ground and never ran off on at all. He went with us on the trail every time we went out and he was always right with us. He's such a great dog, but normally he's into everything. He was so tired at the end of each day that he didn't even try to break into the cooler or the food box. This photo was taken on the bank by the spring we were playing in. He had been swimming and running and chasing wildlife all day and he was pooped.

Bar 50's trails were pretty well marked and they had a map. I found it pretty easy to find my way around once I had my bearings, but i confess the first day without a map I was nervous about finding my way back. I shouldn't have worried b/c there were some east/west roads that ran through the place and as long as I kept oriented to them, I could find my way back. Plus, Freeley has built in GPS...

Speaking of GPS, I couldn't get mine to work there. It kept telling me there was a weak signal. I did get an average MPH, which was very slow, due to hills and rocky terrain, but it kept going in and out. I've never been anywhere that my GPS didn't work so well. There were lots of rocks, but Deli did the whole thing barefoot without missing a beat. The first day I rode Freeley without his boots and he did protest after awhile. He didn't want to walk through the streams b/c of the rocks and he was very careful and slow. The next two days I put easy boot epics on him and he was much happier. I have never used epics on him, but he did great. Granted, according to my weak GPS signal, I probably didn't do more than 12-15 miles any of the days, but I had no rubs and he seemed very happy to have them. I did wonder if back boots would be good and I'm thinking of ordering some for him, but he was really ok. The terrain was a bit like a combination of Robber's Route and Big foot Boogie.

My good friend, Sylvia came with her 14 year old daughter. Unfortunately, Sydney, the daughter, isn't as interested in riding as she used to be. She's more into boys and less into horses. So, she did ride with us a one day but then slept the next 2 days. Sylvia said that her ride on Thursday was the best ride she and her mare had ever had. Her mare used to be crazed to ride. She had to be in front and she was always pulling on Sylvia. Now she rides her in a rope halter. It seems that a new feed called Kool and Kalm is the answer. I'm thinking of trying it in the future.

This week, Jackie, who owns our barn, is going on vacation. I'm helping out to help with the day to day running of things b/c she just hired some new folks who don't know the routines yet. It will be a busy week.

I'm starting to work on my music and massage therapy schedule for the fall. One more is being a little tricky to schedule with and I'm experiencing some frustration with it. I have two hours with the same client and I want to do them in the same trip so that I can see more clients. His mom wants me to come late (after supper) 2 different days which means that I won't be at home with my family two nights and I won't be seeing other clients and earning more money b/c I'll be going to her house 2 nights. It could be that the client can't hack 2 hours in a row (music and then massage therapy) but I wanted to give it a chance, or do one afternoon earlier than the other so I'm not gone 2 separate nights. I'm not sure how to work on this scheduling issue.

Life is weird

I'm going through a period where everything seems like it's out of sync. My days don't flow like I want them to. I'm haunted by some unexplained anxiety in the back of my mind. I'm doing things I enjoy. Music and massage therapy are both picking up, yet, I'm haunted by some undefined stress in the back of my mind. I have forgotten how to just be care free and have fun with complete abandon. There is always some project that needs to be done and no matter how much I get done, I still feel like I'm never finished. I don't know if I'm putting undo pressure on myself to accomplish some intangible thing or if there is something that needs to be done at the root of it all and I haven't found out what it is yet. I sleep "ok" but I dream weird dreams. I second guess myself and wonder if I'm making the best decisions. I want people around me to share my perspective and point of view, yet I lack the persuasive skills to get them onto my team. Instead, i come across as abrasive and bossy. I want to have tranquility. I want to concentrate on reading books and accomplishing tasks each day. Even when I sit and read, I think about what else I should be doing. It's like I have this running commentary and turmoil in the back of my head.

I have wondered if I need medication for ADD or some sort of anti-anxiety medication. So far, what has worked is mixing up Bach flower essences, getting plenty of exercises and just learning not to push myself so hard. I expect a lot out of myself, so sometimes it's really hard to just to take a step back.

In other news: Maggie and I are going to the Hill Country natural area to trail ride and camp in a couple weeks. We went 2 years ago and had such a nice time. There is water and swimming and hours of trails to ride. We're going to take Joe Bear and Freeley, unless I somehow have managed to pick up Deli from Larry's by then. I doubt that I will. I could probably borrow Duchess instead of Joe Bear, but I want to take the little guy. He's so great on the trail and she had such a good time with him last time we went. After our trip to Bandera, I'm leaving Maggie with Shawn's parents in the Hill Country. I'll have a whole week to myself. If I have earned enough money, I will taking some riding lessons with a lady in Georgetown on the way home. I want to get some Centered Riding in on this trip to save gas. Once I get my clinics or lessons done, I can take the instructors training in 2008. This will give me the credentials I need to teach more adults and have folks take me a little more seriously in the ring.

We rode today, even though it was hot. We tried to do some interval training, but Joe Bear wasn't cooperating. Maggie would like to compete him, but I'm just not sure his P&R will ever be suitable. After the canter work, and the walking and a 10 minute rest, he was still breathing over 17/15 seconds. Freeley OTOH was just marvelous. I think he might make a dressage horse. I'm not sure he tossed his head one time today. I love that horse!

New Trailers, Cat Adventures and other random thoughts

Why is it when I'm standing in my kitchen doing dishes, I can think of fun, clever and witty things to write. Then, when I sit down to actually do the writing, much of it flies out my head?

I wanted to post a picture of my new horse trailer. I'm very proud of it. Ok, I realize it doesn't look like much, but I am really happy with it. My old trailer was much older (built in 1984 and rusty) and half the size. I had trailer envy for years of people who could pack up to go on any kind of ride and have all their stored in the trailer and ready to go. Now I have that too! It's very fun. I still have some bins at the house that I have to put in my truck each time I go camping, but it's so much cooler to leave the horse stuff at the barn and the house stuff at the house. When I come back late from a CTR I don't have to worry that my saddles will be stolen from in front of my house b/c I didn't want to completely unpack my trailer at 2am. It has a tack compartment and since it's really a four horse and I never haul more than 2 horses, I always have room for extra stuff.

It was really fate how I got this trailer. One of my friends emailed and said she was selling her trailer and was I still interested in it. So, I put my old trailer on Craig's List and asked $1500 for it, which was also the asking price of her trailer. I had taken really good care of the old trailer, and with metal being so high, I felt OK about the price. I figured worse case scenario someone might make me an offer. One Sunday morning a couple came by to see it. They drove it around the block and came back and handed me money. I was shocked! I drove to Arkansas to meet my friend and picked it the same day.

On the subject of Cat adventures...I have this cat (pictured here) Her name is Daisy and I love her dearly. A couple weeks ago she got in my neighbors vending truck and was gone all day. I didn't realize she was gone b/c she is in and out all the time anyway. She hopped out of the truck at a vending stop, and my neighbor didn't know she was my cat, but knew she belonged to someone in the neighborhood. That night she came over and asked me if I had a grey cat, which I did...so we went looking for her. Remarkably she was where she had let herself off the truck. When she heard me calling she came running to me and clung to me all the way home. She hasn't beenfar away since. I guess she likes us and prefers to live with us.

This w/e I"m going to a CTR in Cass County, TX. I'm trying to decide what stuff to take. I know it's only Tuesday, but if I don't plan ahead Friday always creeps up on me and then I'm surprised that it's time to leave. Each day I have a task designed to help me get ready to go out of town. Today. I'm preparing the rice for one of the dinners and making my list. Tomorrow I will go to the grocery store and to Walmart to pick up some things I"m going to need. I will also pack my truck. Thursday I will go to the barn and pack my trailer. If it goes well Friday morning I will get up and get in my truck and hook up my trailer and leave straight away with no fuss...of course, I've never actually known it to be that easy.

Maggie and I biked this am for 30 minutes. Not a bad start.