Tuesday, September 6, 2016

the right Path

You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever. Psalms 16:11 NASB http://bible.com/100/psa.16.11.NASB

This is today's verse of the day and a good follow up to yesterday. Yesterday I was reminded not to take vengeance or hold a grudge. Today I reminded that God will show me my path.

I have spent so many years allowing myself too be tried in the court of public perception. I never wanted to know that someone thought badly of me. I wanted to make everyone my friend.  I practice being friendly to people I don't even especially like because I feel that it is good and kind. I also feel like each person has qualities that are worth loving even if I don't like them. There isn't a person on earth I wouldn't assist if they needed me regardless of my greetings for them, or if I even know them.

I spent so many years saying yes to other's demands that I often lost track of myself and I over worked myself. I wanted people to think I was a super woman, but truth is I often did a poor job of everything I took on.  I have been learning over the last decade to be more true to myself. I'm following a path I feel God has outlined for me over an ego driven path that seeks human approval.

But what do you do when key humans object to your path?  I don't feel it is necessary to convince anyone I on the right path but it is often hard to be separated from people with whom you would like to have a relationship. Or even worse, with people who have been an important past of your life and have now gone a different way. When you love someone you share their hurt and their joy.  I appreciate that people live us enough to be concerned about the speed of our relationship but I also wish they could share our joy. I know there has to be a balance of concern and acceptance. I'm just not sure where the line is. We know we are on the right path and we know we are walking in God's path but approval of humans makes things so much easier.

I am so lucky to have Michael in my life. I feel that he is a gift straight from heaven. I know we have moved fast. The funny past is that I have never been a fast mover. I have always been the holdout in a relationship, holding back part of myself or peeking around the corner to make sure I've made the right choice and that no one better is out there. After meeting and loving Michael I don't think I can imagine anyone else in my life again. We fit each other so well. We like each other other's company so much. I never believed in soul mates before but now I do.

A friend told me a quote today: your opinion of me is none of my business. I like it and I need to remember that goes both way and keep my own opinions to myself more often, Because this opinion thing is a two way street.


Val said...

That NOMB quote is pure gold; I can't recall who relayed that truth to ME but I refer to it often... The only opinion which really does matter to me these days is my son's; I'm trying to set a good example for him.
I can't say this first week of training is off to a great start: I was able to print out that newbie training plan on my mom's color printer & had it spiral-bound, ready for notations but only got it one "real" workout, a short hike w/the dogs at a park (it used to have about 3 mi of riding trails which ain't much but it would be a nice safe place to take my colt).
I also ordered a new swimsuit which ain't easy with summer behind us - I've looked at the fancy triathlete suits but not gonna invest until I'm a little farther down this training path. Tonight I'm gonna try to make the meditation class which will probably do me more good than anything!
Lying awake at 2 AM obsessing about all that I SHOULD be doing is really counterproductive.

Alice Steinke said...

I cannot tell you that I have actually started to train at home yet. I have been going to my boot camp in the morning last week I only manage one time. This week I will have to come next week I will have to. I will hopefully start the triathlon training after I get over being sore from the ride this weekend.