Medifast weigh in and reflections

I will be weighing in on Wednesday at Medifast. I think I have 2 more weeks to go on my plan, maybe 3...I have decided to really be vigilant this week and eat correctly since I'm home and Peter is gone. I thought it could get me back on task. I did pretty well today.

I'm finding out all kinds of things about myself through this dieting process. I find that i don't like to go weigh in at the center on weeks when I know I have gained. They start to nitpick me about what I have eaten, what I'm doing, how much I have exercised. Of course, I know this is their job, but it makes me feel naughty, which makes me want to eat more food to prove my independence. That is surely messed up. I find that I really hate having anyone tell me what I should eat. I already know what I should eat. Most of the time I do it well. Sometimes I don't. I know that I should eat about half of what I do (when I'm not paying attention or eating out) I know that lean meats and lots of veggies are better for me than pasta and cream sauces. Sometimes I want the pasta and cream sauce. Mostly I am able to say no.

I'm not sure how to start doing Medifast full time again. I wonder why I'm "over it" mentally when I was doing so well before Christmas. I wonder why it's not easy to go back to my shakes full time.

I was up today when I weighed on the WII from the weekend at the convention, but that didn't surprise me. It will be interesting to see what i am tomorrow. I'm still noticing an over all trend upwards. I will start transitioning to food soon, but I guess, realistically I already have. I think part of me feels like I can't make my goal anyway, so "why bother" which is totally the wrong attitude. I'm still striving to lose. I just keep creeping up.

But, I have lost inches and I need to cling onto that! I have lost a bunch of inches.

I still think there is something in me that is afraid of succeeding in this arena. Something holds me back when I start to dip below some sort of invisible comfort level. I want to be thinner and to have a beautiful body...and I'm working at it. I just have to get my mind right and figure out why I keep stopping myself.

Great NATRC regional convention

Maggie and I went to the NATRC regional convention in Oklahoma City, OK. We had a great time and the horses received their awards. I got to sing Karaoke and dance in a smoke free bar, which is always a pleasure. It was such a fun, and relaxing weekend and I got to see my best buddy, Amy Martin, who agreed to be my room mate even though I snore.

Peter is on a business trip this week and it's weird to be here without him. We often do things independently at home, but it's still nicer to have him in the house. Maggie is asleep and I will be going to bed in a few, but decided to watch Friday's ER that I recorded.

This evening Maggie and I watched 3 movies. We watched the Secret Life of Bees, Hotel for Dogs and Dr. Horrible's Sing along Blog. They were all good. Secret Life of Bees was incredible, Hotel for Dogs was sweet and Dr. Horrible was oddly disturbing and funny.

I hope to accomplish some things this week. I plan to clean house from top to bottom, do some sewing, watch all my movies that are not movies that Peter would appreciate, digitize some pictures...anyway...I have a full list. The weather is going to be crap, so I won't be able to ride anyway, I might as well accomplish something else :-)

A Tribute to Liberty

My friend Karen, and breeder of Liberty, my awesome horse wrote the below and I wanted to share it. Without her stallion/mare "accident" he wouldn't exist.

A Tribute to Alice and Liberty

Isn't it interesting how "mistakes" turn out? You see, Liberty is the
product of two breeds that one would logically not think of mixing. The two
breeds are total opposites in their gaits. The Paso Fino is bred to have a
short quick stride and the Arab flows in long, ground covering strides.
However, both breeds are similar in their temperament. They both possess
heart, stamina.and brio. They will go and go for you. They are quick and
intelligent.

Liberty's sire was a beautiful, bold Paso Fino. He had the smoothest gait.
It was so thrilling to ride him and have his luxurious mane, that was at
least a yard long, whip along beside you. He was not afraid of anything on
the trail. Rabbits could jump out or birds could fly up and he would be as
steady as can be.You could take him anywhere and away from other riders. He
was not dependent upon any other horse. He was brave on the trail and
successful in the show ring. He would have been great at distance competition.
Unfortunately, he died as a result of a tragic accident at only 7 years
of age.

Liberty's mother is an elegant, demure, Arabian of Polish lines. She was
used primarily as a brood mare and was not ridden in competition. However,
the Polish horses are known for their athletic abilities and devotion.

Liberty was one of the most beautiful colts I had produced.He was so
balanced and fluid. He was striking in his black and white coloring. Just ask
Alice to see his baby pictures! He inherited boldness, integrity, and
quickness from his sire. From his mother, intelligence and refined beauty.
From both-heart, stamina and great feet. I now think that the two breeds
combined to make a great endurance horse!


Liberty was definitely not a finished horse when Alice bought him. He had
been raised well and taken care of. He understood the saddle and blanket,
tied and loaded well, and understood the longe. However, he had been
mounted only a few times, and had never been off the farm. But, he was mature
and ready to go under serious training.

Alice took this very green horse and worked hard at training him. She
worked through several training issues with courage and tenacity. In addition,
she was not afraid to reach out to the community to ask for advice. It
is no surprise that she has reached this level of success. Now, as Liberty
and Alice embark on their next level, (50 milers) I am sure that we will all
hear about many more accomplishments.

I salute Alice and her award for Liberty as the #1 Half Arab of 2009.

Sincerely,

Karen Haile
Rancho del Rayo

Karen has great horses and she has been reducing her herd some...anyone who reads this...I can probably get you guys in touch with her. She has some beautiful animals.

The year of the YMCA

I joined the Y 2 years ago and have hardly used it. I don't really like the machines and would rather walk outside. I love water aerobics and swimming but the Y with the pool is across town and not as easy to access as often as I would like. However, now that I have discovered Zumba and now am discovering other classes, I am excited about the Ymca again. Class tonight was huge and I loved my work out. I plan to make pilates tomorrow morning. I feel really good to be working out and focusing on exercise.

I found out tonight that Liberty is the nation's top 1/2 Arab for Natrc. I am so proud of him. I think I cried for 10 minutes when I saw the note in my facebook box. I had no idea. I keep reading it not quite sure it's true :-)

Still trying to decide about the fifty versus 25. I am starting to think 25 and the 50 just because it's a new venue but I kept keep from wondering if I am selling us short.

Nice ride until the cactus

Cactus hurts! Yes, I realize that is a huge newsflash, but it's one I share freely. Yesterday, while having a really nice ride with a friend, Liberty spooked huge at something (problem a wild turkey or a deer) and left me hanging in the air just above a huge prickly pear. Of course, since gravity is ever present, I went straight down into the cactus and the fire ants next to it. I wasn't hurt, and got up quickly. Liberty being the good boy he is did not run away. (Funny how he runs away in the pasture as a game before I ride him, but seems to know leaving me after I have fallen off is just wrong) Peter helped me to pick out the prickles I couldn't reach, but I have some embedded still as I have little welts where the prickles will just have to fester out. Oh well...it was a nice ride anyway. I got back on and rode off. Funny how I'm not scared of him and really don't worry about him spooking, even though he does. I think I just trust him.

The bad news is that I now missed two Zumba Classes. I'm bummed, but I could not zumba being sore from falling off and still having prickles.

Weigh In

I maintained this week. I have only lost a total of 20.5 now. I was at 24 pounds, but then gained weight back over the holidays. I have lost some of that, but not any in the last 2 weeks. I know some of it was going to San Antonio and some other cheating, but I'm recommitting myself to ditching at least another 10 pounds before the end of February.

I did another Zumba class tonight. I didn't enjoy this class as much as I did the first one. It was a different instructor, and was actually a little easier, but I found that the faster pace not as interesting. There is another one at 7pm tomorrow at the same place that I went before and I hope to make it over there in time after seeing clients.

I get to ride with Alanna tomorrow. The weather is supposed to turn south the next day, so I will be grateful for the ride.

My 50 mile ride may be in danger. Max, my friend Eric's horse, is sick and he doesn't think his mare is in good enough shape. He doesn't want to drive from MO to TX for 25 miles and I can't blame him. Doing a 50 alone sounds pretty dull to me...will give it some thought.

popcorn

I may have to face that popcorn is my waterloo. I need to get it out of the house where I can't make it when I think I am hungry. I need to limit my popcorn intake to, at the most, the few times I go to the movies. Far better, I should just decide that popcorn for me is doughnuts or chocolate to others. I love dessrt and I eat it, but I have deceivedmyself about my popcorn intake for far too long. People say airpop it...blech! I would sooner not eat it at all as eat it in 'diet' form. I have already been thinking I should eat it only once per week at most but I think perhaps it should go on my never list. Popcorn is not on plan!

Good news is that I did an hour of exercise today...but was up 3 pounds from yesterday. I need to go back down 3 pounds before weighing in on Monday.

Since the holidays have not been 100% and I don't know why.

Today I almost had a serious accident at my field. Fiera had gotten tangled in some wire I had been in the process of eradicating. She had it wrapped around all four legs, her body and her neck. She was still connected to the fence. She was very quiet and didn't move while we freed her. I was very proud of her. She has a good brain. I finished cleaning what I thought was harmless wire.

Liberty was very naughty today. He waited for me to put hands on him and then took off running. Maggie chased him down on Dixie, not giving him a break until he was in the round pen. He finally went in because I fed Fiera and he couldn't stand not take it from her. Then he got to work more, but it was 30 minutes before I could catch him. Don't know what it was all about because he worked perfectly, faced me, played all the games but was jumpy to touch and very twitchy. It was like he was spooked though who knows why.

Tomorrow, grasslands.