End of a long week

I think we're all finally on the mend here. Maggie had croup and then I had croup and now we're all feeling better. So mcuh better, in fact, that Maggie went to play with a friend she hadn't seen in ages. I'm still feeling a little headachy, but I need to get over it so I can work this week, since I saw no clients at all last week.

I'm still feeling pretty blue and down in the dumps. I don't have any reason to, and I visited the doctor for some other things and brought this up. They have recommended a counselor to visit, and depending on what she says, they may start me on an anti-depressant. I find it a bit amusing that I am having to jump through so many hoops to get started on something for depression and anxiety. I have friends that waltzed in their doctor's office and were handed prescriptions and samples with no questions asked...me, I have been to two different doctors who both asked me tons of questions and still question whether I need it. One of the doctors asked me if I was an anxious person. I looked at him and said that I would not call myself anxious, but I suspected all my friends would say I was anxious. Since then I have been noticing how I fail to be able to relax. I just am not sleeping well, my memory is bad and my brain is scattered. The doctors are trying to pin it on my return to work, but I was feeling this way last spring and went to my family doctor who told me I had to see the psychiatrist, which I never did. I was told by so many people that the psychiatrist would find something wrong with me whether or not there was...I honestly don't know the answer. I just know that I'm really not working that hard and I want to be happy. I love my life, my family, my job. Everything is fine, so there is no reason for me to be feeling this way.

Which brings me to my weight. I haven't lost any of the holiday weight. Not sure why I gained holiday weight as we didn't go anywhere and except when my dad was here, I didn't really overeat. And even then, I was conscious of making good choices at my meals. I didn't do anything to lose it, and I didn't do anything to gain these 5 pounds back, so it's hard to figure out how to get rid of it again. I know that scientifically it means that I'm taking in more than I'm burning, so maybe I have the winter blahs and just don't have enough exercise b/c it's cold and nasty outside...not sure, but I've got to make something happen b/c I want to get back below 200 and stay there!

I'm going to sign off and read a book. I have read 2 weeks in as many weeks. Now I"m working on reading/listening to Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince so that will take awhile.