Sunday, May 29, 2016

The real world

I have often fantasized about what my life would look like if I could have had everything the way I want it. I would have enough money, a significant other who wants to be with !e and never gets on my nerves, no one getting me up to run around before I'm ready and no small children waking me up (i raised mine thank you very much). I stead i have none of these things gs and most of the time I am pretty happy.

And then we have days like yesterday

After wishing for company on Friday I have gotten more than I bargained for yesterday. It has been loud, no one is minding and I was told that I had to submit to the will of someone who refuses to submit to my wishes.

What the hell am I doing?

I'm not entirely sure. I do know that I am ready to go back to being alone. I want to watch TV and crochet and have quiet. I want to have adult conversations without children. I love children. I love these children but this weekend they are on my last nerve. I don't know how to resolve it.

Honestly I'm not that torn up about it other than realizing I will never have this 24 hour period back and I'm going to try to find peace today before I send them on their way.

I did accomplish a lot this weekend. I have rearranged and and cleaned and organized. It would be nice to just have some quiet though.

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