Wednesday, September 28, 2011

One of those days

Today was just a bad day all the way around.  I got in trouble for something early in the day and it colored my whole day.  I was caught using my cell phone during a massage session.  Honestly, couldn't say when I did it. I play music for the clients during their massages from my phone and I don't know if the mom saw me flipping through music or actually texting, (which I do occasionally when someone texts me and it seems important) but I don't sit in a massage with anyone and text or email with both hands or more than sporadically.  So, anyway, I did it and I got caught and I lost the client. which makes me really sad b/c I liked that client and it wasn't a regular thing to text at her house, so it's kind of weird that I got caught.  It ruined my whole day. The program manager brought up how I lost clients last year b/c i was talking too much...of course, that hasn't been a problem since I've been playing music for the clients with my phone b/c we all have something to listen to. I love giving massages, but sometimes, it's slow and boring for the therapist.  I try so hard to only chat with the clients who talk to me and often I find out that the parents or the clients think I talked too much, even when I've made an extreme effort to zip my lips. I just don't know how to be silent I guess. I find myself hoping that the doctor will say I have ADD and whatever magic pill they give me for ADD will just silence my brain and alleviate my need to be stimulated.  It would be so nice to just have a quiet brain that doesn't need to be fed information.  I asked the PM if anyone was complaining about me talking now, b/c I've really been working so hard not to talk to them even if they talk to me, and she said no, that no one had complained...but now I got busted for a random texting/emailing phone event. I even asked if it was possible that the mom saw me flipping through music for her daughter b/c until a few weeks ago, I didn't even bring my phone into their house. I never thought I'd get "fired" from a client for using my phone. I figured that the worse thing that would happen is someone would say "hey, don't do that". I feel like a dope...

Then from there the day just went to heck. I was late everywhere I went, though I did get a really nice haircut.  I also found out that a client I thought I was going to lose in a week is on for another month, so that's a good thing.

The agency I work for has experienced cuts to their specialized therapies so my schedule was going to reduce from 15 hours down to 13 hours anyway, but now it's going down to 12 and then 11...not enough. emotionally it's enough to keep me full up, but fiscally, i need more, steady income.  The great part is that i have some other contracts that have really pulled through and I'm continuing to cultivate more new contracts all the time, so that my eggs aren't all in one basket.

Today is my mom's birthday.  She sounded happy when I called her. I wish I could be there for her birthday dinner with my brother tomorrow.

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